'Glamorous' Fergie unstained by new fashion deal

Give it up for our girl, Fergie! The Black Eyed Peas singer and budding solo star isn't about to let an infamous stain on her pants -- um, make that reputation -- prevent her from pocketing a cool $4 million.

That's what she's reportedly getting for her new promotional deal with Candie's, whose products are sold exclusively at Kohl's stores. Apparently, Fergie just isn't earning enough bling from licensing her image and excerpts from her song, "Big Girls Don't Cry," for Candie's current advertising campaign.

Not content to be paid merely to be the celebrity spokeswoman for Candie's line of teen-oriented fashions, shoes and fragrances, Ms. Fergalicious has now struck a lucrative deal to promote those same products -- in the lyrics to her songs. That distinguishes her from such previous Candie's celebrity shills as Hilary Duff, Destiny's Child, the Dixie Chicks and Jenny McCarthy, who apparently didn't realize they could make even more money by writing "original" songs that promote Candie's directly in their lyrics.

"With record sales in decline, you must find novel ways to make money out of the music. The trick is to make the brand part of the song so that it slips down easily rather than chokes the fan," said an apparently straightfaced official for Fergie's record label, Interscope. "Candie's will reach teens, but it has no say over exactly what Fergie will sing, or when. Fans might think she is just singing about candy. But it's got to work in the song. Fergie does not sing jingles."

Jingles, no. But songs that pimp for Candie's? Hey, if the price is right, why not? Then again, if Candie's really wants to clean up, they'd market a special line of "official pre-stained Fergie pants," modeled after the freshly stained pants she wore during Black Eyed Peas' belated San Diego performance at Street Scene 2005 (see accompanying photo).

Given Fergie's lyrical brilliance, we can't wait to hear her ingenious new Candie's-fueled lyrics. That's why we made up some of our own: My lovely Candie's lumps (lumps) / My lovely Candie's lumps (lumps) / In the back and in the front (lumps)

Or how about: Aint nobody rip it like me / F to the E-R-G-I-E / I rock it hardcore for my fly Candie's You go, clothes-whore girl, all the way to the bank.